Handling Criticism


                                                            

People love to talk and words are free for use. So, there’s nothing to stop them. In general, people love to criticise more than compliment. Also, those who compliment, do so with a caveat. ‘You are doing well…but’ or ‘This is a nice piece of work…but’ – so the compliment, in reality, becomes a veiled criticism.

Before, I go further, I’ll share a real-life example with all of you. It will show you that you cannot please everyone. Once, I stopped by the desk of my colleague, to check upon him – another colleague commented, ‘Don’t you have any work?’ The other time, I just passed by the desk of some other colleague, without stopping, and the comment I heard was, ‘Don’t you have any time?’ So, you see, how people react? Whatever you do, people will have something to say.

The best way to handle criticism is to completely ignore if it is destructive and pay attention if it is constructive. If what is being said about you or your work or anything related to you has merit, then use those comments to improve, change – you are getting free feedback – make the most of it. But if the comments are harmful, emerging out of jealousy, then DO NOT REACT. Respond by not doing anything.

Another example: Imagine you have spent hours in selecting the dress and getting ready to go for a party hoping that you will receive an endless stream of compliments but when you reach there, you get a cold response. No one says anything and the ones who say something, goes like, ‘Why didn’t you wear a saree?’ or if you are wearing a saree, ‘Why didn’t you wear that Pakistani suit?’ On hearing this, your morale will go down –but no, don’t let it go down. Tell yourself that you are wearing the right stuff. Completely ignore the comment (don’t ignore the person though – he/she maybe a good individual – you see, 99% of the times, people simply say things just for the sake of saying without meaning what we understand).

But there are times when we may be doing the right thing but in the wrong way. We may think we are right but we aren’t. Ask someone whom you trust to give an honest feedback. Constructive criticism is helpful. It is like light dispersing darkness.

On a final note, you can’t decide what people say about you – good or bad –but you can surely decide what you say about others. Let it be something GOOD.

-          NZ

10.6.2019

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